Hope you can resolve your issue soon, but I’m not sure how much of help I can be.
I do not have the same issue as you do.
One thing I could suggest is to isolate the Org-roam issue from others.
Comment out your (add-hook) where you load org-roam-mode.
;(add-hook 'after-init-hook 'org-roam-mode)
See how my Emacs starts up in this video clip below. The total length is about 38 seconds; 21 seconds or so are used to just start Emacs. I then manually call org-roam-mode, which finishes almost instantaneously (I have about 5 files for this).
My .emacs for this video is located in my GitHub repo; I just commented out the part where org-roam is loaded at start up as above.
This config is used only for writing Org-roam guide. For my usual one, I delay loading of Org-roam until I manually call it.
You might like to load up both desktop and org-roam (and others) at startup, but maybe some sort of selective loading is one way you might like to consider…
If the timeout issue still persists, then getting a backtrace would help the project look at the problem. I’ve written up a quick guide here – see section 6. Call M-x toggle-debug-on-error manually before you call org-roam. You will get a backtrace if you hit the error.